Log in

No account? Create an account
Roses are Red...
Or any color
27th-Mar-2007 12:14 am - Oh dear...
Rikkai Pride
Seems like most of the entries I've made this year have been more than a little depressing. It's not that I'm trying to be depressing or calling out for a pity party, but since I've made a point posting about my life and my current situation, it seems it can't be helped. I am sorry about that.


This Page could have me occupied for days. It's quite lovely~ Informative, not clutted with images and easy to browse through. Reccomended.

I don't remember the exact day, but I think the tennis team is coming home very soon, right? You realize I want to hear everything about the camp, right? From what I've gathered from your journal entries, it has been quite... Eventful?
5th-Mar-2007 04:37 pm - Hm.
Don't really feel any different, but today's actually shaping out to be a pretty good day. How is everyone at camp? Are you having fun? I hope you are.
Also... We're having fish tonight. :P
5th-Feb-2007 03:41 am - Alone...
Well, not completely, but still... Everyone's away at their training camp now and well... It feels a little bit lonely, I'm afraid. I wish I could go with them, but obviously I can't. Would have been nice to be there and just help them though, but alas. Gives me more time to concentrate on my rehability at least. I'll try my best! :D And I really hope they'll have a good time at the camp. ♥ Best wishes to you all~
29th-Jan-2007 12:53 pm - Hm...
I really can't see this staying as a permanent in my life, but I hate to admit it. But maybe it's just like everything else I took more or less for granted. It's all slipping away. The only constant thing right now I guess, is the sky above me, and even the sky changes. Does that mean nothing's constant, for certain, absolute...? Does that mean everything I took as the truth is nothing but a shadow on the wall, a lie or a segment of my imagination? I don't know. I hate feeling like this, like I'm walking in a mist, unable to grasp even the slightest bit of substance that would for someone be called reality, hate not being a proper part of society anymore. I really hate it.

I dreamt I played tennis against Tezuka Kunimitsu.
15th-Jan-2007 03:15 pm - Well...
It's now official... Almost all nerves that control my right hand are dead and won't come back to life again, unless some sort of miracle happens. So I guess my life as an official cripple has more or less begun. Which means mom getting on my case to apply for a disability card, but I just can't get myself to do that just yet. It's so... strange. I still feel as if it's happening to someone else, not me. Because my mind is still sharp, strong and I still have the voice inside that says damn if I'll let this take over my life, damn if I'll let this weak body make me into something I'm not. Typing with just your left hand is quite tiresome, but I'm slowly getting the hang of it. I only wish my legs worked properly, then I could still play tennis, but I can't. It's unnerving.
Sanada... Want to go to a game with me? If I can't play, I still want to watch, and not on TV thank you very much.
3rd-Jan-2007 02:50 pm - :)
Well, Rin never really made it to Tokyo, but Christmas and New Years wasn't a total waste anyway. I had quite a good time, and I'm feeling quite well right now, so I might be able to go to Okinawa later. I hope so.

I saw my physical therapist yesterday and he said I looked better than I've had in a long time. Maybe it's something with the season, I don't know... It's making me feel good in some way.

This past year has been filled with up and downs, a lot of which I never type here, because I just can't bring myself to it, but I somehow feel like things are settling down, at least a little bit. This new year... Whatever it might bring, I'm sure it won't be the same emotional rollercoaster as last year.

Everyone, please take care of yourselves and meet the new year with your heads held high! ♥
1st-Jan-2007 10:36 pm - Meme...



21st-Dec-2006 01:05 pm - Layout Change. :)
I changed my layout, because simple is best, no?
Uhm... I've met Echizen Nanjiroh. It was... Interesting.
I'm actually able to attend school today, and I'm glad.
Do you all like my layout? :)
20th-Dec-2006 04:15 pm - ...
For the recent secret Santa gifts... I thank you from the bottom of my heart, whoever it is who's given me the gifts. They're both simply beautiful. Thank you.
15th-Dec-2006 11:17 am - ...
Yesterday was not a good day. Really not. Well, the time in school was good enough, and I enjoyed myself there, talking with the team and all. What was bad was that when I got home, during dinner... We were having Ceasar sallad among other things, and one of the crutons got stuck in my throat. I mean, really stuck. I couldn't breath, couldn't do anything and before I knew it I had blacked out. I woke up in the hospital and well... My doctor says the disease is getting worse, my reflexes are starting to suffering, reflexes such as the swallowing reflex. If this keeps up, it's only a matter of time before it affects another one of my reflexes, maily the breathing reflex. And that... wouldn't be good. The worst part of it all is... If I don't get better soon, there's no way I'll be going to Okinawa over Christmas... D: I'm only hoping for the best.
4th-Dec-2006 01:56 pm -
Hm... I learned to do hearts. It's pretty. :) I see Fuji Syuusuke-kun uses them a lot... You can do other symbols as well. ♠ ♣ . I find this strangely amusing... :D I still haven't figured out how to do the diamonds though. Does anyone know?

There are still a lot of interesting things you can learn to do over the Internet, and since I have a lot more free time lately, I can actually be a dork and try to learn them. No more newbie from me! :D

I do miss having my days filled up with activities though, but what can one do? I'm trying to pursuade my parents that I can go on a trip to Okinawa though~
8th-Nov-2006 03:09 pm(no subject)
I went back to the hospital yesterday. Of course it was distressing, and the rehability is rather painful, but I still consider it a good day. Why? I met a couple of kids that were admitted to the hospital when I was there for my surgery. They all remembered me and were really happy to see me again. It was heartwarming. Really heartwarming. It actually brought me to tears. I weep far too easily nowdays, it's rather... pathetic. But well...
Now I'm going to go and call Rin~ ♥ <-- figured out how to do that! :D
18th-Oct-2006 10:58 am - Hmmm
I'm sorry if I've been absent lately, but I've been sick. I'm better now and hope to get back into socializing again, like a normal human being. From what I hear, is the student exchange program running fairly well, I just hope Yanagi is all right... We'll see about that.

Either way, it's wonderful that I can be outside again, the fall is a beautful season, and I'd hate to miss out on the world preparing itself to go into a deep slumber. I'm planning to show up at tennis practice today, all though I won't play, I still need to see how you are doing. And of course greet our exchange student welcome, all though I'm quite a bit late for that...

Yes, time to get going.
25th-Sep-2006 09:19 pm - :)
Happy birthday, Akaya! :D

(I'd make a fancy, pretty font and all, but I'm afraid I don't know how...)
14th-Sep-2006 02:37 pm - Hmmm
I woke up by the sound of a crash. Of course it was very distressing, so I got up and made my way into the kitchen. Erika had somehow managed to start a fire in the microwave and when she tried to put it out, she fell on one of the chairs and scraped her knee pretty bad. :( The fire is out now, thankfully, but mom and dad weren't very pleased. Oh well...
I also ran into Fuji Yuuta the other day. Interesting...
I don't know. I have this assingment in front of me, and I just can't seem to concentrate on it. It's not that it's boring, it's just... pointless. I don't really see the point in me writing a five page essay on this subject, because I've already written a very similar essay that was ten pages long, but apparently, since that was done for another teacher, in another class, I have to write this here too. And my pride tells me that I should't just copy/paste. Which might be silly of me, but...

Anyway. Things are going slow. I spend half of my time in the hospital again, and half of my time trying to catch up with school work. I'm sorry I'm not really attending practice as much as I should, I'm trying really, to find the time, but it's getting harder.

Yanagi, I hardly see you in school, I hardly see you online... Is everything all right?
1st-Sep-2006 01:22 pm(no subject)
Got a letter from the hospital today. The results of the CAT scans are here.



Oh well... At least the party is going to be fun...
22nd-Aug-2006 12:58 pm - :)
We're going to have a private party, just us in Rikkaidai. I'm looking forward to it. :)
On other news, my back wanted to show me who's boss yesterday, so I had to almost overdose on painkillers. I don't remember much of the evening, but when I woke up, Yanagi was there. How... peculiar...
14th-Aug-2006 05:30 pm - Hmm...
I just wish I was back in school... I miss my friends. Especially Sanada and Yanagi, of course. And Akaya, I'm sorry things got messed up last time you visited... Maybe you would like to come over some more and try again? :) This time, I'll make the cookies. ♥ <-- just learned to do that. Cute, isn't it? :)
10th-Aug-2006 03:00 pm - Meh...
Yagyuu is sick. That's all I'm going to say about that, because it's too painful to write about.

Other than that... Not much has been going on. I've been let back to school, all though still in a wheelchair, and I'm planning to show up at practice today, if only to keep an eye on things.

And yes... I believe Seigaku's captain is also interested in gardening. That is very nice.
8th-Aug-2006 02:46 pm - Hmm...
Since I had nothing to do while waiting for the doctor's appointment, I messed around a bit with my layout... I got the hint from Fuji Syusuke, and I must say my journal looks a little better now. Do the rest of you like it?
8th-Aug-2006 09:56 am - Update on my Condition
I spent the night trying to find a good position to sleep in. My back hurt, bu not to the extent that I needed to go to the hospital, but enough for me to be unable to sleep. Finally I caved in and went to get some painkillers. The bad thing about that is that I have to drive my wheelchair through the entire house, trying my best not to bump into something and wake people up. Mom is a very light sleeper, but can be pretty cranky when woken up, and I really don't want to wake Erika. She's still just a child, she needs her sleep. And I know she's been worried about me as well. Waking her up in the middle of the night isn't going to improve matters...

When I woke up this morning my right hand was completely numb. I tried to move it, move the fingers, the wrist... Anything. Nothing happened for five minutes. Nothing at all. I guess I panicked, crying for mom and dad to come. They did, actually, which surprised me, thinking back. Dad rubbed my arm, from the hand all up to the shoulder, and he must have done something right, because the feeling and ability to move came back. And yes... it hurt. Like a million needles, but it passed after a few minutes and now it's good.

I won't be coming to practice today though, I need to go to the hospital for a check-up. Sanada, once again, you're in charge. Please take care of everything. And I'm sorry about this...
7th-Aug-2006 07:12 am - Interesting...
This weekend have been interesting to say the least. It all started on Friday. I came home from school as usual and was just about to change into something more comfortable so I could go out in the garden and just... relax. Well, apparently that wasn't something fate wanted me to do... Since I felt this immense pain in my lower back and buttocks. I know that pain, I've had it on and off ever since I came down with my condition. But it's supposed to be over and done with, right? Well, picture me on the kitchen floor, trying to crawl over to the phone without moving my lower body too much. Not a pretty sight, I can tell you that.

Anyway, I managed to get a hold of our family doctor and he came over as fast as he could, checked me up and then rushed me to the hospital. There they poked and prodded and then poked again... I think they poked me with at least seven different syringes. They did a lot of checking up on me and I had to stay in the hospital over night. That would be why I wasn't in school on Saturday. Yes... And would you believe it took my parents 20 hours before they came and checked on me? Yes, of course they schedule was too busy to come and see me. Of course... I do feel their love, really I do. /sarcasm

I got to go home on Saturday night and the pain was almost gone, thank gods, and I had a good night's sleep the night between Saturday and Sunday. Sunday was pretty uneventful to start with. Me and my little sister was out in my garden, I just mainly sat spacing out and thinking, and she drew me and a part of the garden. She's good actually, she has potential, especially if you take into consideration that she's only nine years old.

Then they called from the hospital.

Guess what?

It's still here.
31st-Jul-2006 03:26 am - #001
Keeping a journal? Well, I suppose it will be a new experience. I never thought I'd reveal my inner most feelings online like this, for everyone to read, whether I know them or not. Just because I'm jumping the bandwagon though, doesn't mean I'm going to let up on you guys. I do hope a lot more people will show up at the next practice. Or you'll face the consequences.
This page was loaded Apr 20th 2018, 10:24 pm GMT.